Thursdays pain

All this time I was wasting hoping you would come around
I've been giving out chances every time
And all you do is let me down
And it's taken me this long baby but I figured you out
And you're thinking we'll be fine again but not this time around

This morning I left for school feeling hurt. I left, for the first time in ages, an empty house. Nobody to hug me, tell me to go careful, to have a nice day. Just me, myself and I. My dad drove my mum up the hospital for some chest scan thing, maybe a first of many. She said she’ll need to go have a load of blood tests as well.

I really dont like it when someone tells you its going to be okay and not to cry, It just makes you worse. You turn your head away and repeat ‘Dont cry’ in your head until you believe that your emotions wouldn’t cause any more unessicary hurt to anyone. And then you look back at them and they say its going to be okay, so you have to look away again muttering agreements that in your heart you know might not be true.

Holding on the days drag on
Stupid girl, I should've known
I should've known.
I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale

I believe that fate and luck has everything to do with whats happening. Bad fate. Bad Luck. Just whisper in my ear and hold me close. Im needing it right now.....


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And Truth be told .... I miss you. So long It feels. Everyday without you it hurts more. Anyone else wouldnt understand. Never leave me, please. Never forget the three of us and our times together.