Monday and Tuesday were terrible. Absolutely terrible. And Wednesday came and all was okay again. But, Monday and Tuesday, I seem to grab at anything and everything to get away from it all. And now, I’m not heartless, and I have regrets, but I cannot take them back. You know, digging yourself a hole, you start, you get too deep, and you can’t climb out. And nobody will throw you a rope ladder. For that, I am truly sorry.

But, I did kind of break the toilet yesterday with my fat arse. For my Dad to then SELLOTAPE IT BACK!? Oh my actually days. Ladies and Gentleman, Knock-off Nigel. He also had a joke-y kind of go at me. It was pretty funny.

I don’t really have much to blog about, but I am actually blogging! I know I’ve been slacking off. Sorry. I went to an Alice in wonderland Panto on Wednesday night, which was cool. And today I got my psychology revision for eating disorders started. Bah! I haven’t even revised the last unit, the one on relationships, but I kinda have an end of topic exam question to do in class next week on eating disorders, so I have to. I could so easily fall asleep right now, but I’m planning on doing a little more revision and I might even eat a Kiwi. It’s bloody cold outside, thought I’d just tell you.

Well, Todoloo! Haha. Is that even a word?

Story of my life
Searching for the right
But it keeps avoiding me
Sorrow in my soul
Cause it seems that wrong
Really loves my company

I don’t know what to write. I just feel empty. Alone. I slowly feel myself falling to pieces, and I can see it happening. What’s the point? I’m just walking in a straight line, passing the same things all the time. The same thing, over and frigging over again. I’m fed up, in all senses. I miss people more than I should, and the only thing I want, I can’t have. A hug. That’s all I want. A simple cuddle, hug, squidge, whatever you want to call it.

I watched the first two episodes of Vampire Diaries last night. Team Stefan, actually, because Damon seems a bit of a knob. “Thinking of you” – Katy Perry played in one scene and I turned the television off and went to bed. I just feel hopeless now. Like, there is someone out there looking for me, but they stopped for a chat with some other girl and forgot about me. What can I do? I’m just stuck in Wroughton, living with my over-worked Dad, my stressed depressed mother and my cousin who doesn’t get recognised for the deserving person he is.

Right now I feel like crawling upstairs to my room, lying on my mattress and just staying curled up for hours upon hours doing nothing but listening to the sound of my own breathing. There’s just no point in doing anything else. I think I’ve done what I’ve needed to do, whatever that was.

At least I blogged though, right?

Reach out and touch, whisper my name. I will deliver, again and again. Straight from the heart, honest and true, I promise you this, I will be there for you.

They say the world must end somehow,
They say the end's not far from now;
I think they're wrong,
Don't worry your life away,
Start living for today,
Don't think about tomorrow.

And if the lights go out on all of us,
In just a year or two.
And if the sky falls down like pouring rain,
Then I'll be here with you.
I'll go down with you.

Well I'm gonna try for all I'm worth,
To stay with you till the end of the earth.
Don't let me down,
Don't let your feelings win.
Don't give out, and don't give in,
Don't think about tomorrow.

Cause if the lights go out on all of us,
In just a year or two.
And if the sky falls down like pouring rain,
Then I'll be here with you.
I'll go down with you.

And if the lights go out on all of us,
In just a year or two.
And if the sky falls down like pouring rain,
Then I'll be here with you.
I'll go down with you.

Im near enough being forced at pillow point (Minus any pillows being involved) to write this blog because I havent done one since the seventh, as you can clearly see. Well, I really am sorry. I just havent had much to blog about. I used to blog about such trivial things though, such small things. Like, what I ate, where I was going. It's kind of bored me slightly now... maybe. I dont know. Just, I havent been inspired by much. I usually get inspired by pictures or music or something like that, but you know I cant have pictures right now, I have a few pictures on my phone I need to upload, stupid laptop. Major parts do not take over two weeks to get to the repair centre! Dammit!

Tonight, Becca and I are meeting D and A at Pizza Hut, where I will most likely have a chicken salad. NOM. And COOKIE DOUGH. NOM NOM. and then we're going to the cinema to watch a film not yet decided, with popcorn! NOM NOM NOMITY. And Coke. NOM NOM NOMITY NOM. Feeling slightly ill thinking about what were going to consume. Bahaha.

Do you know how much Im in love with my friends? Being Becca, and people I know online.....

On that point, Im going to raid Becca's laptop for photo's !!!! Hehehehehehehehehhehe Ahem.
*Evil laughter*



AWWWWRRRR CUTEST THING EVAR !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Goes all mushy*

Have to go google how many hours in a week there are, because Becca is doing a survey on how much time and what people do for lesuire time. and the person were doing at the moment is my mother. Hours in a week = Amount of lesuire time she has.

I took a chance on loving you

November!

..... Don’t give me that look, I know I haven’t blogged in a while. Its not like I did it on purpose all “Ha-ha, I’m not blogging, you have to read something interesting now!” I just haven’t because I haven’t. There really isn’t much of a valid reason for it. Maybe because I haven’t got pictures to put on. I like to have a picture at the top of each post, but as you can clearly see for the past few posts I haven’t had any. I don’t like it. It makes the posts boring. That’s why I also add youtube videos every now and then with a song I like, just for something to break up all the writing (Or babble in my case)

I tried to upload some pictures but the old desktop computer was having none of it. I was going to show you my pumpkin. It was the first pumpkin I have ever touched, let alone turned into a jack-o-lantern. Is that an Americanism? Anyways, I did a neat little cat. It was awesome! Oh, Oh… Mother has just invaded. She’s on’t phone to Mark trying to find some piece of paper. –Shrugs- Me no know.

D’ya want an update!? No? S’yeah you do!

For Halloween, I was cooler than a cool person in a cool town in coolsville. Urr… what? I went down Box mine with my cousin, his cousin and his friend Craig. Box mine is the second biggest mine in Europe. We went at midnight and we were there for about four or so hours. We got back home at half five in the morning and then went to bed. But, oh my days. It was so dark and creepy. And WOW did I ache after!? It was muddy and we had to do a lot of climbing. The funny part is I was the only one to fall anywhere, which yes, is very typical of me, but it wasn’t even in the bloody mines! It was in the woods on the way TO THE MINE !!! Deary deary me.

Half term I did no work whatsoever, and therefore I still owe a lot of work. Whoopsys. I spent most of my half term asleep or on Twitter. Bad times. I know I have no life though, so its all good. Well anyway, I have so many unfinished things. Like, Three essays for ICT and an English coursework draft that I haven’t even started thinking about let alone doing it yet.

Urr, Got a discount at Subway last week from Becca and I’s favey guy, Ali. And he gave me a one arm hug. S’yeah, youre jealous, admit it. We managed to miss every single English lesson last week too, Becca and I. Trust me, it wasn’t completely intentional. (Well, the last one wasn’t, we went to subway and missed the bus)
Tomorrow I’m going in early so I can sit in the silent study room and get on with those ICT essays. I could do them now, but I’m a silly bitch and I cant be bothered. I’m just sat listening to some of my old favey music (Lemar – ‘’Its not that easy’’ and ‘’Lullaby’’ FTW) and writing more of that old “The Ark” story. Yeah, You know how cool I am. Ill post it when I finished the next chapter.

LOL. Just remembered. I text my Mum “Urr…. This place, around the corner” and she text back all “Don’t be cocky” and when I got back she was all “That first text already got my back up and then you send me that” and she made a “Duurrr” noise, thinking that’s what “Urr” is, but I explained “Nooo shitattack..” Sorry, Shappi joke just wandered in there. “No, Mum, Urr is like Urm… Youre thinking.”
And WTH!? “Got my back up” Sorry, are you a cat now? Seriously? I hate that phrase. But, then again, I hate most things my mother comes out with. “Oh, why don’t you give your guitar to AJ” “No, Mum” “Do it” “FINE. FFS” –Week later- I need a guitar for my course at school. –Facepalm-

And this is why Becca and I both think my mother is a strange person. I was at Becca’s earlier and showed her the text and we were both there like “O.o Wtf?” Bahaha. Remembering that, I want apple crumble now. I had it for pudding last night when I was at Becca’s. I was there from Friday. It was fun, I knicked her IPod and she fell asleep on the laptop so I knicked that and stayed up until 2am on it before going to bed. Then we woke up Saturday at 11am? And we were basically tired all day and went to bed at midnight last night. Woke up to having no quilt ‘cos Becca stole it, got my own one, fell asleep and then woke up to Oliver and Becca playing boppit, I believe. Lol. Well, now youre all updated, have a nice day, Ill see you next time!

G’day!


#RandomFact Lemar is epic, so shu’up.