Sleepy post.

I just woke up, and Im a tad emotionally unstable. I have a cold, feeling totally crappy and under the weather, and my Mother just ditched me to sleep. I only just looked at my school timetable to see I have a lesson at 11:10. If I hadnt paniced when she went to bed and got up to get ready, I would've ended up missing another lesson due to over-sleepyness. This probally makes no sense, Im half-asleep as I write this. Im just so pissed off. Like, Angry-Cry-y mood. Its raining, My mum ditched me, and Im ill. I just wanna sleep. I dont want to go to school. I actually almost cried when I saw I had to stay another hour for english. I just want to crawl in a hole and well... stay there for a very long time.

Its raining outside, I dont even want to get dressed properly. URGH. Im texting Becca now. Just a unhappy smiley face, to see what she replies. and then go from there. I hope its less than 17 texts, because thats all I have. I hate feeling crappy like this. I dont even have a valid reason why! IM SO STUPID!! FML.

Here come the tears. :'(

Better go make breakfast in a second. Toast. I lived on that on saturday. My mum never bothered making any food, which she never does anyway because shes all "You know I dont cook on saturdays". and to make matters worse, I came down at 8pm, pretty hungry, but not because my stupid cold, and My dad had made his own food and not even bothered with me. Yeah, thanks for that, you knob. URGH.

Oh, and yeah, Im pretty run down with this cold and yesterday I got dragged into babysitting for Kelly and Christopher while they went to the dentist. I was half asleep at like 3pm when Kelly ran to ask, but I couldnt say no, could I? They said an hour. The minutue I got into the house, Kelly hands my Natasha's dinner and gets me to feed her. The kids were okay though. Only the odd tantrum, It was fine. I was the nice aunty that let them have a bar of chocolate and a packet of crisps each, clearly because I was rebeling about the whole thing.

Oh, and the word "No" is clearly a word my Mother doesnt understand. Yesterday morning, I was on the laptop, talking to some of my friends and she phones up. I know she only phones up for the laptop, so I reluctantly answered. She was all "Bring the laptop down" and I was all "No" and then she'd ask a few more times, each time my answer no, and then she'd end up hanging the phone up on me. Seriously, she's so rude to me! If I did that to her, she'd shout the hell out of me. Oh, and the hanging up is supposidly her saying yes for me? Like, what? I said no several times, did you not listen to me? You say no and I have to take it as an answer, so why dont you take mine? She's always on the laptop playing stupid games that she could easily get for her XBOX 360, whereas Im talking to friends and reading things online. I have half a mind to 'Accidently' wipe the games off the laptop and then ban the site she downloads them from. She would be none the wiser. But I wont, because I know I shouldnt.

I really think my mum takes advantage of my temperment. I argue, but when I do, I can never win. She has a sad life that one day, Ill feel sorry for her, and then next? I dont give a shit. I had a dream that somebody at my school put posters up everywhere of my blog and my family saw it and they hated me. Well, If that ever happens, be sure to know, Its not my fault, its yours! You made me like this because you expect to much from me and give me hardly anything in return. and thats why you make me livid and on the verge of saying "I hate you"

Other than that, I just had a very scary dream about living in a big house and getting locked in some big bathroom whilst being chased by the axe-man from Resident Evil. I climbed through a vent and ran away from him, but I ended up getting into room and trying to smash a window that just would. not. break. So I guess I died. I woke up to my mum shouting "Im going back to bed now" and then I had the whole sleepy-panic-dont-know-whats-happening thang going on.

In my mums world, My no's mean yes. And I hate it.

Can I have a hug? :(